Left Behinds

The anti-andrewsullivan.com. Or, the Robin Hood (Maid Marian?) of bright pink Blogger blogs.

Friday, January 13, 2006

JT Leroy: The Movie

I speculated yesterday that Susie Bright might be raising a public stink about JT Leroy partly because she's wised up and wants to secure a spot in the inevitable movie. I suggested some actresses who could play her (Kate, Renee, Reese). To my surprise, Ms. Bright commented here that "No, I hadn't thought of the movie version until now! You are so funny! I'm sure I won't be in it, since I am really a minor character compared to some. The people with the biggest vale of tears to unleash are just sitting in their chair, still stunned. But since you started it, I would MUCH rather be Reese. I loved her in FREEWAY."

Heh, didn't take long for Ms. Bright to change her tune. OK, so it's settled: Reese Witherspoon plays Susie Bright. How would the rest of the casting go?

After the jump is the official Left Behinds casting for

JT Leroy: The Movie


Laura Albert: Pomo genius, or unscrupulous Kathy Acker wannabe?

Who could portray this manic Victor/Victoria with more edgy pathos than:

John Cameron Mitchell


Savannah Knoop: Andy Warhol cypher, or inarticulate babydyke celebrity-stalker?

She proved with Twins that she's back, and who could deliver the line "I don't need this in my life right now" more snarkily than Darlene?

Sarah Gilbert


Geoffrey Knoop: Stands by his woman, or stands to make a quick buck?

Post sex tapes, this is a perfect way to reassert the thespian chops of:

Colin Farrell (and who wouldn't pay to see Colin and John Cameron make out?)



Dennis Cooper: Supportive elder statesman, or someone who really has no right to criticize others for exploiting teenage hustlers?

If playing a lovable gay man is the quickest route to an Oscar, what about playing an avowed pedophile/sadist? Well, who has less to prove than

Dustin Hoffman


Mary Gaitskill: Laughing stock, or who Laura Albert would be if she could actually write?

Hey, if a 39-year-old woman can impersonate a gay teenager, why not give this role to the fabulously sardonic

Sandra Oh

Susie Bright: Former colleague of Albert's pegged as an early mark, or "just a minor character"?

By consensus, a sexed up

Reese Witherspoon (proving in this early role that she's got the ta-tas to play Bright)

Carrie Fisher: Occasional writer of JT's fiction, or just trying to associate her name with something other than Princess Leia?

Continuing with an argument I made a few weeks ago, this would be the perfect transition to good, middle-aged roles for:

Courtney Love (post rehab, pre anorexic weight loss)

Shirley Manson: Credulous celebrity friend, or washed up rock goddess desperate for attention?

This is the perfect comeback role for a stunt-casted

Winona Ryder

Any other suggestions?



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7 Comments:

  • At 6:22 PM, Blogger Stroll said…

    Hmm...maybe I'd rent it. ;)

    Loved your comment on Dennis Cooper's blog by the way. My thoughts exactly.

     
  • At 8:18 PM, Blogger Solomon Grundy said…

    Heh heh, thanks. I did have a giggle when I thought of Hoffman as Cooper...;)

     
  • At 10:27 PM, Blogger LL said…

    So when are you gonna put your email link up so I can email you and make friends with ya?

     
  • At 11:30 PM, Blogger Dickon Edwards said…

    Some salient points made, and great jokes, even though I think you're pretty unfair to Mr Cooper. And I note from one of your comments that you say Ms Savannah is a lesbian. How do you know?

     
  • At 2:30 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    but who will play winona ryder?

     
  • At 3:54 AM, Blogger Solomon Grundy said…

    but who will play winona ryder?

    Elijah Wood? Heh.

    Also, I hope I'm not too harsh about Cooper. I really like some of his work. I just think it's probably not wise for him to call other people creepy. I mean, have you seen what comes up when you type "Dennis Cooper" in Google Image search? Let's just say I hope the NSA isn't monitoring my web browsing, because that shit is not legal.

     
  • At 6:25 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    very funny and i had no idea that reese ever bared her ta-tas on film. I still think the olsen twins could be S. Knoops

     

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