Left Behinds

The anti-andrewsullivan.com. Or, the Robin Hood (Maid Marian?) of bright pink Blogger blogs.

Sunday, October 08, 2006

A Vast, Gay Right Wing Conspiracy

That, according to fundamentalist ideologue Tony Perkins on Fox News Sunday just now, is what's really to blame for the Foley scandal.

There's a network of gay staffers who we have to investigate to see if they knew about this and covered it up. ... It's a symptom of a larger problem not only within the party but within the culture.


So the coverup is due to the fact that Republicans allowed closeted gays into the House? What?

More than 50% of the electorate believes Hastert knew and covered up something. I guess Perkins is trying to control damage among his base, who are desperate to instinctually gay bash (they must be experiencing some major cognitive dissonance the past week). But as David Corn just pointed out on ABC This Week, a number of "Velvet Mafia" closeted Republicans have gone public that they brought Foley's folly to the leadership's attention years ago. Nobody obsessively protects their rep like a closeted gay, and somehow I doubt the Roy Cohns of the world are going to gracefully take the fall for this one.

Overall, this spin is pretty weak. I can't see it working on anyone other than, say, certain members of the House passionate for some mysterious reason about cracking down on openly gay gays and child porn.

UPDATE:

It's been amusing watching well known closeted gay Republicans come out this morning to give perfunctory spin. The anxiety in Ken Mehlman's face as he talked about party unity was hilarious. He looked like he'd rather have a big scary vagina dentata in his face than be discussing Foley on Fox News.

UPDATE II (Antid Oto):

From The Daily Show's latest rundown on Foley, a diagram of the conspiracy.

Gaynetwork

Stewart noted that "The gay staffers network, they control everything, except, apparently, our government's policies toward gays."

YouTube from which I captured the above here.

5 Comments:

  • At 10:29 AM, Blogger Antid Oto said…

    The Times and Andrew Sullivan on the Foley Affair and closeted Republicans. Though Sullivan makes a bizarre referenece to the "alleged 'prankster' page."

     
  • At 2:15 PM, Blogger Solomon Grundy said…

    Ugh, did you like that Andrew Sullivan thing? Maybe we are (or I am) the anti-Andrew Sullivan.

    Before seeing your comment I was planning on writing a post about how this is not an issue of gay staffers, this is an issue of closeted right wing freaks. The Democrats do not spawn Roy Cohns, J. Edgar Hoovers, and Mark Foleys because there's no need to turn your sexuality into a Dorian Grey monster in your attic if you're out of the closet (yes, there are closeted Dems, such as McGreevey, but they never seem to act out as bizarrely as right wingers, who have such a self-loathing disconnect between their policies and their personal lives.)

    This is a problem particular to the right wing, and more specifically to the closeted freaks in the right wing, who are legion.

    When I have a moment I'm going to post a list of closeted right wing hypocrites, because unlike the mealy-mouthed Andrew Sullivan I don't feel the need to protect them.

     
  • At 2:21 PM, Blogger Solomon Grundy said…

    Also, there's a really fucked up sex panic going on. The kid was 16, the age of consent in DC. Foley is an ephebophile, not a pedophile.

    He clearly did something wrong (and is creepy), but these important distinctions are lost in the gay-baiting hysteria.

    In addition to the list of closeted Republican freaks I'd like to put together a list of heterosexual males who have sex with 16-year-old girls, and evaluate the level of hysteria that that action inspired. The hypocrisy is disturbing.

     
  • At 3:55 PM, Blogger Antid Oto said…

    No, I didn't like the Andrew Sullivan thing. I didn't really think the Times thing was all that good either. I was just linking.

    And yeah, the hysteria is disturbing. But you're dreaming if you think the mainstream press can even spell 'ephebophile', let alone understand what it means.

     
  • At 12:31 AM, Anonymous Nick D. said…

    I work under the Depertment of Fagriculture. Brilliant joke.

    Loved the take on this.

     

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