Search and Destroy

Another of the best parts of having a blog is that you can procrastinate by analyzing your site statistics. My personal favorite aspect of this time-wasting is tracking the various strange search engine results that lead surfers to Left Behinds.

Now, it's no secret (well, to me and Antid Oto, at least) that a lot of our traffic is driven by people searching for our discussion of the ending of Cache(which is, months later, still getting tons and tons of traffic and comments, perhaps corresponding to a new international release or something) and for the full text of the story Brokeback Mountain (sorry, Annie, but I'm sure you can spare the royalties). We also get a steady stream of traffic for stuff like the Spazz Wheelchair (lots of curious shoppers? maybe LB needs to indulge in more retail therapy), Kimya Dawson (devoted fans combined with very little attention in the mainstream music press), and The Laffer Curve (a good title for a boring subject probably gets a lot of Google attention).

So far, so no-brainer. What's more amusing for me are the accidental search results.

Stuff such as someone in Tripoli coming here after typing "how to join parkour by phone in libya" in Google. Now, to get this combination of search words, Google had to combine my lustful gushing about adolescent parkour boys with my ruminations about the sexual proclivities of the crown prince of Libya. I'm sure the aspiring Libyan free runner got more than he bargained for.

Another perennial search engine source (seriously, at least a couple a day) is some variation of "spanked red behinds" (we also get a lot of guys Googling "ladies behinds", probably based on my "Ladies Man" post about LL Cool J as the gay rapper heh). Along the same, ridiculous lines is yesterday's "uncut sex." Some porn-lover was probably looking for some hot pics, and instead he discovered my narcissistic rambling about the perils of circumcision.

I know there have been other, funnier ones, but all I have access to is the past week's results, which have included "etymology coon" (interesting/creepy mostly because it was on German Google) and "left earring gay" (some guy in Brisbane who apparently was worried about how girls would take his new piercing? too bad that led him, again, to the post about LL Cool J as the gay rapper).

AO, do you remember any funny ones?