Left Behinds

The anti-andrewsullivan.com. Or, the Robin Hood (Maid Marian?) of bright pink Blogger blogs.

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

The Secrets Behind the Author Pics

What does it say about me that I loved a piece I read in Jane Magazine recently? This evaluation of author photos over the ages was like Vice's Dos & Don'ts, but with a literary gloss.

However, there were some missteps (possibly due to Jane not having the freedom to be viciously slanderous, the way we bloggers can be).

Joan Didion
Is this an A.P. or a circa-1970 Virginia Slims ad? It makes me want to light up and say things like "that new Hopper film is sensational." Is that wrong? You tell me, is it wrong?

OK, funny and true, but what about the underfed, dessicated elephant in the room? This pic is all about La Didion's eating disorder. That ciggie's the only thing she's eaten all week, and she's only leaning against a desk because her atrophied little legs can't hold her up. I mean, look at the size of her left arm. Joanie's been through a lot, but let's not semiotically glamorize the fact that her real problem with the 1960s was that she spent them barfing into toilets from Haight-Ashbury to Selma, Alabama.

Dana Goodyear
I just think Dana Goodyear's pretty.

And I just think the author of this article wants to get into the New Yorker. Dana Goodyear is attractive (and has amazing bone structure), but is "pretty" the right word? The fact is, she looks like Tina Yothers from Family Ties.

Why is it that smart, accomplished women also have to be "pretty"? What's wrong with having a good, strong, intelligent face (with no lips), and also being a damn good writer?

Okay, enough sincerity, it doesn't suit me. Back to the snarking.

Joyce Carol Oates
Looking like a Reality Bites-era Winona Ryder.

Er, no she's not. She is, however, a dead ringer for one of my favorite actresses of all time, Shelley Duvall. Again, what's with overhyping the hotness of these authors? Is that part of girl power or something? I love Shelley Duvall's face, but she's not exactly a conventional beauty.

OK, I don't know why I only picked on the women she discussed. Probably because I'm more familiar with them and more committed to them as literary stars. But let's keep it real.


  • At 1:08 AM, Blogger Antid Oto said…

    What's wrong with having a good, strong, intelligent face (with no lips), and also being a damn good writer?

    Somebody's sensitive.

  • At 1:17 AM, Blogger Solomon Grundy said…

    hahaha yeah that no lips line was meant to indicate that i realized how autobiographical that whole bit was.

    tina yothers, c'est moi.


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